To my night crème I say

Slime not the pillowcase!

Streak not the sheet!

Waste not your grease

On 100% cotton fiber

Two-ply bedding.

Be absorbed, I beg you

Fill the wrinkles of my

Sad parched countenance

That I may awake

Refreshed and youthful

Ere dawn’s rays

Arouse me from restorative slumber.